I was was walking down a dark alley when I ran into a mysterious man. It was warm outside which made him look suspicious, since he was wearing a trench coat and had a brief case that looked as heavy as bricks. This was the first time I have ever went down this alley and it wasn't a good experience so far. The man looked scared as if he was hiding from someone. I wondered if he had anything to do with the murder that happened this pass week?
2 weeks earlier
Henry woke up this morning feeling great! He went down to the dinner to eat some breakfast when all of a sudden he was approached by a scary looking man. This man had a big black beard with a scarred face and he was wearing all black clothing. An offer was made to Henry that was not re-fusable. He was supposed to go to the bank in about one week and rob the bank for about two million dollars. All was going well for Henry because if he did this he would get half of the money that was stolen.
At the bank Henry panicked and accidentally shot someone which ended up killing them. About a week later Henry got the one million dollars and rushed out of the scary man's house as fast as possible.
present
I decided to follow this mysterious man. I had to be extremely careful not to be heard otherwise something bad could happen. I decided just to go home and do some research on this man. It appears he had one year in jail. I started to panic and freak out when all of a sudden I woke up in my bed screaming. It turns out all of this was a nightmare.
I really like how you start and send this story; with "2 weeks earlier" and "present." This adds a very creative element to your piece, making the short story itself more intriguing. Well done!
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